Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007) review

19. Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem (2007)

Directed by: The Brothers Strause

Produced by: John Davis, David Giler, Walter Hill

Screenplay by: Shane Salerno

Starring: Steven Pasquale, Reiko Aylesworth, John Ortiz, Johnny Lewis, Ariel Gade

“Alien vs. Predator” isn’t a movie I’d go out on too much of a limb to declare a misunderstood masterpiece or anything like that; but I find it a satisfying enough monster mash once you’ve cleared the clichéd bullshit. It’s remained a divisive film ever since, but I’m pretty sure one thing most of us can agree on is that the sequel, “Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem,” is crap. Taking the interspecies battle from the remote Antarctic to suburban Colorado and even throwing in a Predator/Xenomorph hybrid, what should’ve been inherently awesome is actually a stale, dark, nonsensical and just plain annoying movie that has no sense of character or even basic plotlines.

The opening picks up immediately where the last one ended, where a Predator spaceship leaves Earth, unknowingly with a dead Predator carrying an alien, which bursts from its chest as a hybrid of both species. Chaos ensues, with the Predators getting killed and the ship crashing in a forest outside Gunnison, Colorado. A distress signal reaches the Predator home planet, and reinforcements are sent as the Predalien and several facehuggers start wreaking havoc. The forest scenes are investigated by local Sheriff Eddie Morales (John Ortiz); he’s assisted by ex-con frenemy Dallas (Steven Pasquale), who’s reunited with his younger brother Ricky (Johnny Lewis), who pines for his classmate Jesse (Kristen Hager). There’s also Kelly (Reiko Aylesworth), an Army soldier who’s just come home to her husband Tim (Sam Trammell) and daughter Molly (Ariel Gade); all parties are thrown into the mix as the war between the aliens and Predators plunge the town into mayhem.

So obviously the biggest change is that the setting is in a civilized populated area, rather than the interstellar or remote locations of previous films. In theory, I actually don’t think this is a bad concept, maybe just because it’s the only setting we haven’t seen in any of these movies; however, it’s complicated by the fact that this is also supposed to take place before “Alien,” and unlike the last film, which occurred in an outlying, isolated area, this is a militarized event that would probably be newsworthy and therefore something Ellen Ripley and the Nostromo team would be privy to. Apparently, Paul W.S. Anderson specifically wanted the previous movie to be set in the Antarctic so they wouldn’t break continuity with each franchise, and rejected the idea of a suburban setting. I think this environment provides possibilities as far as scenes of destruction; but it’s not taken advantage of.

While the story at least gives us an array of different locations, the biggest problem is that the visuals are so dark and murky it’s impossible to even appreciate the admittedly cool special effects. The last movie also had choppy editing, but this one just amplifies it, and it’s such a frustrating experience, because these are such good designs, so it’s such a huge letdown when all we get is a bunch of quick movements from unformed, blurry shapes, or the action cuts away. There was such a big deal about this movie’s rating being upped back to R, and there’s barely anything in the way of gore that makes much of a difference. What’s funny is that cinematographer Daniel C. Pearl criticized the last film for looking too bright and staged, and wanted more handheld techniques, but it just ends up looking and sounding so ugly, with an obnoxious snap sound effect anytime we go to the Predator’s infrared vision; this isn’t the time to be artsy Dan, just let us see the monsters mauling each other in its deserved glory.

And unlike “Alien vs. Predator,” we don’t even get the benefit of even a couple of interesting characters to latch onto; everyone sucks. For starters, it’s a little distracting that there’s a main character called Dallas, which was the name of the ship captain in the first movie; but aside from that, these storylines are either completely boring or underdeveloped. Dallas being an ex-con looking for a job: irrelevant. Kelly trying to reconnect with her daughter: never resolved. Ricky being harassed by Jesse’s bullying boyfriend Dale (David Paetkau): the dullest high school bullshit, it’s not even worth getting into, although it genuinely made me laugh when Dallas literally tells him he’s too stupid to talk. This dialogue is generally terrible, but that was a good one. If I were to give the movie any credit at all, it’s that it has no qualms about going all out with the brutality. The first human victims are a father and young son team out hunting, and there’s even a scene at a maternity ward of a hospital where the Predalien impregnates women who are about to give birth, and we see the details of the results.

But what does it matter? “Aliens vs. Predator: Requiem” is just mindless, aesthetically unappealing carnage without any real pathos or payoff, except for lame last-minute sequel bait; but everyone hated the movie, so it didn’t even work. It was directed by brothers Greg and Colin Strause, primarily special effects artists who have worked on “Terminator 3: Rise of the Machines,” “The Day After Tomorrow,” and various “X-Men” movies. They would go onto direct the terrible “Skyline,” so I think it’s fair to say they have talent in one field but not another. The attempted suspenseful scenes are woefully ill-conceived, and it’s not even fun on a “so bad it’s good” level. Both franchises have pretty much left this pair of films in the dust, and while I still have a soft spot for the first one, this one has about six minutes of promise following by an hour and a half of trash.

My rating: 3.5/10